Seeing Red

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    Seeing Red

    Have you ever had one of those days where everyone has just really pissed you off?

    Today is that day for me! Everything! I’m literally ready to scream or punch something that’s how emotional I feel. Because I am not great at expressing my emotions, instead I am writing them!

    I’m supposed to be on a social media cleanse. At least a week without any type of social media at the tips of my fingers. (No that’s not why I am mad for those of you trying to discuss phone addiction). My irritation today comes from the disrespect of those we consider “friends”. My social media cleanse was broken because of someone else’s problems that I got brought into. Actually, my feelings started several months ago: feelings of anger, loneliness, disrespect, contempt. Today though, I have had enough!  While I type, I am seeing red all kinds of red.

    The worst part of all this is…. I AM HARD TO MAKE ANGRY!

    Why do we value things more than each other? I really DO NOT understand this! There’s all kinds of scripture that discusses how we should treat one another! From Matthew 22:40 ‘Love thy neighbor as thy do themselves’ all the way to Luke:31 “Do onto others as you want them to do to you”. So, either we think of ourselves in such ways that “I” being you is much greater person than any other human on Earth…… or we think extremely little of ourselves and that is why we chose to treat others the way we do!

    Whichever it is, IT IS WRONG! We should treat everyone with love and respect! No matter what the case is….. I know it is hard and we are all guilty, including myself, but it is something we SHOULD strive for.

    My feelings have come from my friends. I personally am a ‘people pleaser’, especially to those I consider a friend. I will bend over backwards for a person, give you the shirt of my back, do whatever I can in my power to help in any way I can. My parents have always told me you give love without any expectations of getting love in return. Respect though? Respect is something you should get back in return and expect back in return. If you don’t get that, are they truly your friend?

    There’s a point where you have to say enough is enough.



    I have found myself questioning most of my relationships because of this. From lifelong friends falling off the map. To feeling underappreciated. Someone blaming me for THEIR problems with others because it is more convenient than saying they are the person at fault. To the people around you NEVER having the courtesy to check on or how you are doing, yet you are there for them when they need a shoulder to lean on. There’s a point that taking offense isn’t the case, disrespect and your value to them are! I have been told that I will be lucky if I can count on one hand the people I trust, love, respect, and will be friends with when I am older. But there are times where you feel like you don’t need to start counting. Could it be that we have our heads so far up ourselves we have forgetten the golden rule? Is ghosting people just the way of life? Does one little white lie really hurt? Is what we own more important than those we consider our friends? I’m honestly not sure …. I am flabbergasted thinking that we just don’t care. If we do… we have a real CRAPPY way of showing it! We have become a ME society and not a WE one. We have become so infatuated with what others can do for us, that we forget what we can do for others.


    Pleasure and Temptation rule our minds.




    Maybe my mood is to show me who to remove from my life, or maybe it is a wake up call that I ALWAYS need to remember how I am treating those around me. I would genuinely hate to make someone feel the way I do currently. More so I apologize to anyone I have made feel like this! I pray you will forgive me for my trespasses on to you! And for those who I am upset with, I forgive you! I acknowledge that you did not mean to make me feel like I do, but because we are a ‘Me’ society you did not take my feelings into consideration when you took action

    At this moment in time I am upset from something small, but it is from a lot of different small things added up into one BIG thing.

    We need to do better to be good to others! That is what respect is….. treating, talking, and acting how we would want it done to us.

    I am going to make a conscious effort to respect those around me always. Maybe that will help start turning us back into a “WE” union instead of a “ME” one.



    My prayer: “Lord help me! Help me determine what I am to do with my feelings. Help me turn my emotion into something greater than how I currently feel. Remind me of all of the good in people and not the bad. Show me light in the mist of all the redness. Anger, offense, and disrespect is not something I want to feel, because I want to feel the goodness that is you! Remind us all that we should value and cherish each other more than we do us as an individual. That the things don’t matter but the people and their character do! I pray that those I have made feel like I do currently forgive me. And that you help me keep control of my emotions while I feel this way. Help me remember your word every day, in that I should always cherish, love, and respect those around because they are my brother and sister in your eyes.


    I feel better already! God bless! Have a great day!

    • Mimi
      June 21, 2017 at 5:09 pm | Reply

      Well said. You are growing….

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